When one of my friends got caught cheating he asked me, â€œCan I get my ex back even after I was caught cheating in the relationship?â€ The answer to his question wasnâ€™t an easy one, but once I realized his sincere desire to rebuild trust and to restore the relationship, I gave him some advice on how to go about it and How To Regain Trust.
Some may say cheating on your partner should always end a relationship but you want to regain trust in someone. Well that really depends on the couple.Â I feel every relationship can be save if the couple involve really want it to make it work. Perhaps one of the issues that need to be address after this type of breach in the relationship, is how to rebuild trust between you and your woman.
To Rebuild Trust Is One Of The Hardest Things To Do
The relationship has been compromised because of the actions of the other. Despite of the difficulty, in order to rebuild trust after an affair both partners need to take positive actions and move beyond the transgression.
When one of the partners in a relationship is caught having an affair, the trust that was established in the relationship is broken.Â To rebuild trust in a relationship requires some adjustments in attitude and actions of both parties. This first step is critical if both partners want to rebuild trust in the relationship once again.
The process can be short or it can be prolong.Â To make the process easier when it comes time to rebuild trust in a relationship, the party who has been injured must be willing to forgive the transgressor.Â This can be difficult, however itâ€™s necessary in order to truly restore the relationship.Â The transgressor must also do their part by asking forgiveness and by being sincere in their desire to rebuild trust and to restore the relationship.
Usually, a partner cheats because something was missing in the relationship.Â For men, the lack of respect and admiration from his woman is one of the reasons why he gets involve in an affair.Â When a man meets a woman who admires and respects him he usually is tempted to have an affair with that woman.Â This reason alone doesnâ€™t justify the affair. In fact, there can be many reasons why someone cheats in a relationship. However, finding out the underlying reason someone cheated on you, can help in the process of restoring a relationship.
Letâ€™s face it, if the relationship was perfect then there is a less likely chance one of the partners will get involve in an affair. But when an affair takes place, itâ€™s a good idea to find out the reasons why it took place. This is not easy to do, but necessary it order to rebuild trust in the relationship.
Some of the tough questions that need to be asked when trying to rebuild trust after an affair include:
- What were they looking for in the affair?
- Was the sex in the relationship ho-hum or even worst non-existent?
- Were either of you too busy with work or other activities?
- Did they stop taking care of themselves as far as physical looks is concern?
Another way to restore the relationship after an affair is to go into couples counseling.Â This may be difficult and uncomfortable for the couple but it can help sort out some of the underlying problems that cause the breach in the relationship.
However, understanding the reasons why the partner had an affair is not enough.Â In order to rebuild trust once again positive actions need to take place to restore the relationship.
Saying sorry or asking forgiveness can help, but actions speak louder than words.Â Thatâ€™s the reason why taking positive actions to help rebuild trust in a relationship can significantly heal the hurt caused by an affair.
One of the best ways to rebuild trust in a relationship is to make small promises and more importantly, keep them.Â If you promise to wash the dishes, then do it.Â Keeping promises on a consistent basis is a sure fire way to rebuild trust and confidence.
By keeping your promises, you are reassuring your wife or girlfriend that you have changed.Â It also demonstrates your sincerity in your desire to restore the relationship.
As they say, women have memories like an elephant. They may never forget the transgression you made, but they can certainly forgive you and move on.Â But you need to do your part in allowing that to happen.Â Be patient especially on those occasions when she reminds you of the affair.Â Women need time to heal and to forgive. But if you stay strong and steady for her, she will regain the trust and confidence she once had with you.
You on the other hand, need to forgive yourself in order to move on.Â Feeling guilty forever will do you no good. Instead use this set back as a learning lesson and an opportunity for both of you to grow in the relationship.
One must remember that their is no such thing as a perfect relationship.Â But just like anything in life, relationships grow and mature.Â As both of you grow and mature, hopefully you and your partner will gain wisdom and the knowledge you need to face lifeâ€™s challenges.
By understanding the principles of forgiveness and taking positive actions you can once again rebuild trust and restore your relationship â€“ hopefully for the better.